What Do I Say When Someone Asks Me, “Shouldn’t Your Faith Have Fixed This by Now?”

“Shouldn’t Your Faith Have Fixed This by Now?”

“Shouldn’t Your Faith Have Fixed This by Now?”

That question has a way of sneaking past your defenses. It sounds reasonable. Spiritual, even. But underneath it sits an assumption that can quietly do damage: real faith should make pain disappear on a reasonable timeline. If that were true, Scripture would be a very short book. The Bible doesn’t present faith as a switch you flip to exit suffering. It presents faith as a way of walking through suffering without losing your soul or your grip on reality.

Take the psalms. David, the “man after God’s own heart,” regularly sounds overwhelmed, anxious, and even disoriented. In Psalms 13, he asks, “How long, Lord?” four times in six verses. Not “why did this happen?” but how long will this last? That’s not a man whose faith fixed things quickly. That’s a man whose faith gave him language to stay honest while things stayed hard.

Or consider Paul. In 2 Corinthians 12, he talks about begging God to remove what he calls a “thorn in the flesh.” God doesn’t fix it. Instead, Paul is told, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Translation: the struggle itself becomes the classroom. Faith doesn’t remove weakness; it teaches you how to live inside it without collapsing.

That matters when someone asks why you’re not “over it” yet.

Because faith, biblically speaking, isn’t about emotional efficiency. It’s about formation.

Psychology agrees. Deep change… especially after anxiety, depression, grief, or trauma requires repetition, safety, and time. Brains don’t heal by being scolded. Nervous systems don’t calm down because someone quotes a verse at them. Growth happens as truth is practiced, not just believed.

James puts it bluntly. In James 1, we’re told to consider it joy when we face trials, not because trials are good, but because they produce endurance. Endurance implies duration. You can’t endure something that ends instantly.

So, what do you actually say when someone asks if your faith should have fixed this by now?

You can start by refusing the premise.

You might say, “My faith isn’t about skipping hard things. It’s about learning how to walk through them honestly.”

That answer reframes faith as a process rather than a product.

Jesus himself reinforces this idea. In Matthew 11, he invites the weary and burdened to come to him, not for immediate relief, but to learn from him. Learning is slow. Learning assumes you don’t have it figured out yet. Learning requires patience… with yourself included.

One of the most subtle forms of spiritual harm happens when people feel pressured to present healed outcomes instead of lived obedience. They start hiding symptoms instead of addressing root causes. They fake peace instead of building resilience. Over time, that disconnect fuels shame, not holiness. Faith was never meant to make you emotionally invincible. It was meant to make you anchored.

Paul writes in Philippians 1 that the good work God begins in us will be carried on to completion. Completion is in the future tense. Ongoing. In-progress. That alone dismantles the idea that something is wrong because you’re still struggling.

So, when the question comes (and it will) you can answer gently but firmly: “Faith hasn’t fixed everything yet, but it’s changing how I face it.”

That’s not weakness. That’s maturity.

The people who experience the deepest healing are often the ones who stop rushing the process. They stop apologizing for needing time. They stop measuring spiritual health by the absence of pain and start measuring it by increased truthfulness, self-awareness, and courage.

Faith doesn’t erase your nervous system. It teaches it safety. Faith doesn’t silence grief. It gives it somewhere to go. Faith doesn’t bypass the work. It sanctifies it.

And that kind of work… slow, unseen, and deeply human, rarely looks impressive on the outside. But it’s exactly how real change takes root.

Not instantly. But steadily.

If anxiety feels like it’s running the show, my course Peace in the Chaos was created to help. It’s a short, practical guide to understanding your mind, steadying your soul, and finding calm in the middle of real life. You can learn more here.

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